Monday, 27 August 2012

That subject which divides mothers...sort of.

And no, it's not whether to breastfeed or bottlefeed.  It's not whether you should be a stay at home Mum or go back to work.

It's how much you enjoy the hospital experience.

When I was pregnant with both my younger pair, I counted my impending hospital stay as one of the highlights of the whole experience.  Because I didn't have to

wash clothes
look after the toddler(s)
go to the supermarket

and I received

reasonably nice meals three times a day
morning and afternoon tea
quite pleasant drugs
daily bed making
a nursery for my tiny weeny newborn to spend quality time while I slept.

They are teeny weeny and come in a handy cart with wheels. 
And of course, with your first newborn you think newborn babies are really complex and difficult but once you have a toddler, you realise newborns are actually a complete cinch and feel quite happy to leave your beloved toddling one for a few days with their Dad and grandparents.

Well I did anyway.

And because you know, once you do return home.  It's like, forever.

On the up side, once you get home, you have friends to help you get the hang of breastfeeding. 
There was a bit of fuss during all three of my hospital stays about the benefits of 'rooming in' with your baby to assist bonding.  But I always was quite strongly bonded to my small wrinkly newly arrived aliens and didn't ever think a few hours in a nursery would be damaging to the bond.  And as it turned out, it wasn't.

(I know I was very lucky because I've never had a hint of PND but I can imagine that is quite a different, more serious kettle of fish)

Mike's blessed folks would bring the smaller one(s) to visit in the afternoons so I could have my fix of them.  They would arrive immaculately dressed with healthy snacks and leave again in good order when they started getting festy.  A happy dream.

AND all our babies were born on the Friday before a long weekend.  So we often had friends arrive with cheese and crackers, beer and champagne.  It was very social and pleasant.

And consequently I've always been a bit kerflummoxed by mums who say things like "Oh I left hospital early, I was bored" or "I just wanted to be in my own bed".

Are you mad?? They bring you dinner!! I would prefer to be a bit bored and have dinner cooked for me than be mentally stimulated and have to get it myself.

An my own bed doesn't have a cool mechanism to lift it up and down which is ideal for a poor new mum with a row of dirty great stitches across her lower abdomen.

But as with all things motherhood, everyone must simply do what suits them, so if you're own bed called you a day early, or you couldn't wait to get out of there, clearly that was right for you.  You probably think I'm bonkers.  

For me the thought of those 5 days in hospital are almost enough for me to consider a fourth.  Almost.